My Immortal: REWRITE
by Sakaiya
Summary: A rewrite of the most famous piece of bad fanfiction ever. This is my showing of what the author was trying to say. Done only to show the potential of the story. More detail in author's note inside. Rated for future chapters


My Immortal Rewrite

_AUTHOR'S NOTE! I am not the original writer, which is hopefully obvious by my actual ability to spell. My friend showed me this and it's horrible, she challenged me to rewrite it and try to keep the mary sue-ness. Like Ebony's name and her vampire-ness and Harry's vampire-ness. I'll admit to being pretty stupid for agreeing, but to ensure that I'll finish I'm making this my national novel writing month project._

_THIS IS NOT MY IDEA! None of this belongs to me! Not the story, not the characters, and certainly not Harry Potter. I OWN NOTHING! (except Ebony's backstory cuz I did actually think of that!) If you want to see the original, someone did the heavenly thing of reposting it (Thanks Dreamreaver!) and the link will be in my bio. I did this for two reasons, one to show what My Immortal **could** have been and two because I was dared too. If it has to be taken down and you want to see it, you can always message me and I'll email it to you. Review or flame away, I just hope you enjoy it and that hopefully I'm able to keep my challenge. Encouragement would be great but I'mma try to do this no matter what!_

_That being said, I hope this will be fun and if anyone wants to challenge me to anymore bad story rewrites just cuz, feel free to do so!  
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Chapter 1

My mother wasn't a very creative person. Or maybe, she was too creative but she lacked imagination. Just take me as an example. My name is Ebony. She told me that she named me after my long dark locks of ebony hair. Apparently, in the wind it flows like living shadows, trying to capture all the light it can. That's where my mother's creativity comes in. The woman didn't just name me Ebony. She named me Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. She probably cursed my hair just to make my name fit.

I hated the way people jumped every time the slightest breeze stirred my hair (it made people feel like it was trying to grab them, and drag them down to hell), so I died it. Well I died it as much as I could- my mother was in love with 'the darkness'. The red and purple streaks helped some, but my hair still creeps people out sometimes.

It didn't help that I'm actually a witch. It's not something I regret, in fact I like it. It was the one good thing my mother gave me with her genetics. I was nearly ten before I started showing any potential magical powers at all- my family thought I was a squib.

Finding out about my magic however, wasn't the happiest of occasions. Like the social pariahs we were, we lived on the edge of the forest- as far away from both the other wizards and muggles as possible. Unfortunately, that meant we lived close to the _others_. The others being all the other unwanted magical creatures- the weres, the vampires, the centaurs and everything else.

Being neighbors meant that we'd have to interact eventually. Like every other idiotic ten year, I swore that I was the shit and nothing could hurt me- despite my family's protests. Yeah well, I learned quickly that I _wasn__'__t_ the shit and there were more big bads out there than just me.

I ran, head first, into a vampire. I remember exactly what he looked like. Impossibly tall, like he was seven feet or taller. Maybe my frightened mind exaggerates, but he was tall. Thin, too. His shoulders were broad and square in a way that screamed dominance. The rest of him, though was about as wide as I was. His clothes, though not the best, clung to his frame in a way that showcased how towering he was, despite the lithe frame.

I can tell you his scent too. There was the faint scent of rot rolling off him, like if someone was thawing meat that had been almost rotting when it was froze. There was a coppery scent on his breath. I could only tell that when he picked me up by the scruff of my neck like I was a bad puppy. It was then that I saw the two pinprick fangs in his mouth. It was only then that I knew I had ran into a vamp.

I was scared, but too stupid, or maybe too brave to show it. "Put me down, you fucking freak!" It was my father's favorite term for vampires.

He laughed, spraying bloody saliva all over my face. It was warm and disgusting and salty, and I made sure to frown my face up as much as possible, too. "You… are interesting." He said slowly, almost as if he hadn't spoken in years. "You don't need to die."

It was then that my father found me, deeper into the forest than I was aloud to go. "Let her go, you fucking freak!" He shouted, pointing a wand at the vampire. He was too drunk to think of a spell at the time. The vampire hissed at him over my shoulder, pushing me even closer, getting that rotting scent even deeper in my nose.

"Go away!" I pushed and suddenly, I was released. Or atleast I thought I was released. Somehow, I was over by my father, out of the vampire's reach. The vampire didn't like that. He lunged, and despite the fact that I ran, he caught me. My father shouted spells, but the vampire was able to dodge them. He caught me again, instantly sinking sharp fangs in my neck. It barely hurt, the pinpricks happened so fast. What hurt was after, feeling my blood being sucked out. My awareness was fading in and out. The vampire slit its wrist.

"Drink if you want to live mortal. Become a _fucking __freak_ if you dare." It's voice was deep and gravelly. I was ten; I wanted to live. I drank the blood, the vampire's deep cackle in my ear. And I became one of the undead. Before I ever got the chance to be normal.

It changed me, but not much- not even physically. My blue eyes paled some, to an almost gray at times. My skin paled even less. The worse was happened after my father was clearheaded. I had magic. I was too much of an anomaly to let in the school.

Atleast I would have been before Dumbledore became headmaster. He was willing to allow a vampire in the school. It was time for the wizarding world to become more open to other magical creatures. He placed a spell on me to hide my fangs and make it easier to blend in.

Of course, there are no secrets in Hogwarts. Before the first year was out, people were talking about my special night schedule and wondering what I ate. It was all in the gossip that I was a vampire. Atleast it was until it was discovered that I wasn't the first. I wasn't too concerned who the first was, as long as I was left alone and not prodded all the time.

In my third year, it was discovered that Hogwarts had two vampires. I had managed to avoid that other vampire until my last year. If only that was the most dramatic thing to have happened during my seventh year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.


End file.
